Wednesday, March 11, 2009

9 wandering souls

Imagine picking 9 mindless morons who spent 4 years languishing at MJ, giving them Rs. 60,000 altogether; a 10 day period window and setting them free. Imagine the madness that would unfold.
Thats exactly what happened.
Now, I know everyone goes on trips with friends and this may seem a cliche; but, if you have the patience read on and see the madness unfold.

March 1st
We catch the Sabri Express at 12pm; the journey was a full 30 hours to Trivandrum. 30 hours on a train can be a pain and visiting the toilets is the least of your worries. But, since we were a motley group the 30 hour journey turned out to be the perfect way to kickstart our tour. Avinash bought in lunch and then we got into business of playing UNO. You know UNO don't you. If you don't know UNO, then I will let you know UNO is a card game wherein you need to get rid of your allotted 8 cards and the first person to have zero cards wins. So, Avinash, Shareef and Muneer teamed up and drove Noorul crazy. At times, he had a total of 25 cards on his hands making up a nice Chinese fan. This game went on for hours. But, it was Hussain who broke the records by notching a total of 300+ . (the winner gets zero points and one needs to make sure that he minimizes his score)
Guntur was on the way and the train stopped for 5 mins. Shareef's dad had bought our dinner and was waiting at the station. With military precision Shareef alighted from the train and bought in our tasty consignment; Chicken khorma with parathe Mmmm. After a hearty dinner, another round of you know UNO and deciding on who gets which berth, we go to sleep.

2nd March 6am:- I wake up and stand by the train door watching the coconut trees fly by. Since, nobody else was awake I go back to sleep. After a few hours we wake up, have our breakfast and back to UNO. Few of us, sat on the steps by the train doors watching the green fields go by.
Now, something about Mr Muneer Sheikh aka MS. Every station the train stops at, you see the people waiting at the station, a coolie in red, the softdrink wala, a woman with a kid in arms, and then you see Muneer there too. This skinny guy used to wait by the doors and alight at the station a few seconds before the train stops and stand right in front of our window.
Another funny point was when a woman with a child in her arms, walked about the train singing some songs, asking for alms. For some strange reason, Hussain started singing the same song. Guess, he is looking for a career on the railways. ( Full set hai ab Hussain bhai)

March 2nd, 7pm :- Reached Trivandrum on time. The autowalahs outside the station, said they knew a nice hotel, so we checked it out, the Baban Plaza. It was pretty good so, we booked 3 rooms ( 3 per room). One strange thing about Kerala is that most shops close at 10pm there which left us astonished. We were yet to have dinner and by the time everbody had washed up, it was 10pm. So, the 9 wandering souls walked around the city, wandering in search of food. An autowala, said he knew of a nice hotel, we insisted on halal non-veg food and he said the restaurant has halal food, chicken tandoori, tikka, biryani, grilled chicken, etc etc. We crammed into 2 autos and went to that place. Seemed pretty fancy from the outside, as we alighted from the autos, paid them and entered the hotel. Faisal bhai, went up and asked the waiter, " Is the food here halal?"
The waiter looked at him confused and replied, "Sir, here pure veg hotel"
What? What??? Wo autowalah ki to @@@***&&@@

So, we walk out again cursing, and wander about. Spot a hotel by name Shahi Dhabha. Decent food there; as we have a feast and walk back home. Now, Hussain had had a jaam fruit on the train and a seed lodged itself somewhere in his teeth. So, he goes into a bakery and asks, "Where is dentist here closeby?"
The guy there replied, "There is one Hatya Hospital"
Now, began Hussain's search for Hatya Hospital at 11 in the night. We, managed to get him back to the hotel. Strange as he is, he looked at every poster (including those of politicians) and asks
"Wo Mamooty hai?"

March 3rd :- We had decided to start by 8am, but being MJCETians, that is impossible as nobody even wakes up by then, let alone bathe and get ready. So, we start at 10, get into a Tavera, stop at a place for a quick breakfast and to our first stop Kovalam beach. We splash around mindlessly, like kids. Meanwhile, Mr Imad was fishing, looking into the water with his naked eye and attempting to catch a fish with his bare hands. Poor guy, nobudy told him to put on his glasses first.
One fact that surprised me was why foreigners who are in their late 60s come to Indian beaches,.
Yaha marne aate shahid

We helped the fishermen pull a boat back to the shore,
(Dum lagaake) ( It's hard work)

Another interesting turnout was poor Shareef getting sunburnt. His body turned red, earning him the nickname Lal Badhsaah
Next stop was Kanyakumari where we reached by 4 pm. Shopped for some time. Hussain went up to a vendor selling pearl ear-rings and said
"Ye kaisa dere; 10 rupee mein 20"
followed by peals of laughter.

A vendor selling sea-shells on which he etched names was our primary target. The 9 of us picked up around 20 of these. Hussain gave him an advance of 200, saying we would be back in an hour as we had to go to sunset point. We spent 30 mins, watching the sun set slowly, steadily in the ocean. A great time for a photo shoot.

We stopped by at the vendor to pick up our sea-shells, Hussain haggled over the price and managed to bring the total down by Rs 50, paid him to which the vendor said "Thankyou" and left.
After driving for an hour, Hussain remembered that they forgot to decuct the Rs 200 paid in advance. No, wonder the vendor said "Thankyou".

After a long drive through clogged streets, we reached our hotel in at 11 pm. Later, we heard Rahul Gandhi had paid a visit to the city which is why there were traffic restrictions.

March 4th:- We wake up later than usual and go to Veli Lake which has a boating facility. We catch 2 autos. Kerala autowalas are quite friendly and speak broken English, unlike those in Tamilnadu.
This guy, Satish seemed pretty enthusiastic. He started rattling names of places that must be visited in the city. He also said
" Here, I take you to one place. Beeeautifulll girls will do massage you"
This rang alarm bells in the young boys onboard. We burst out laughing. Imad, said
"No, no we are all married. We have wives"
Bolte nahi Imad tum; shaadi bhi ho gayi kate

To change the topic, I asked Satish,
"Did Rahul Gandhi come here yesterday? All the streets have his posters"

He replied
"Aah, Rajeev Gandhi has come tomorrow"
Ab zyada puche to Genghis Khan bhi aaya boldinga ine

Veli was a nice place, and we enjoyed boating. To get back to our hotel, we took two buses, which dropped us somewhere and then, it was back to the 9 wandering souls part. We checked out of the hotel and took the 4pm train to Cochin
An interesting development on the train was the case of vendor selling dvds. Hussain called him and he handed a huge bunch of dvds. After sifting through them, hussain picked up a few. One of them had 5 films, SlumDog, Milk, The Reader, and some other name which none of us had heard of. Hussain bargained here too
"Arey! what so costly. At kothi I bought for Rs. 25.
Last week on the Chennai train I bought for Rs.25"

Its difficult to control your laughter when Hussain starts bargaining.
Reached Cochin at 8 pm, checked into a hotel Najaf Residency, right infront of the station. Had dinner at Mughal restaurant.
Another thing strange at Kerala, is that, you almost burn your hand when you touch the water jugs at the restaurants there. Moreover, the color of the water is a light orange. On enquiry, they said it's ayurvedic water.
Kamaal hai, nahaane ko baithe to thanda paani aata; peene ko garam paani

But, we followed a strict policy of bottled mineral water wherever we went.

March 5th:- Called a Tempo at 7:30 to take us sight seeing. We, of course the Hyderabaadi Nawabs got ready and had breakfast by 10 am. We boarded the van and saw that a Nepali couple was coming along sight seeing with us. We had kept them waiting for 2 hours. Now, there is a taste of IST with a dash of Hyderabadi masaala for them.
The driver was a character worth mention. Name was Dil, as he flashed his Drivers License and there it was
Name: Dil

And, he claimed himself to be " Bcom First Class"

All along the way, he waves at his friends on the street, be they other drivers, policemen and even college girls!!
He pointed to a huge boarding with a picture of some Kerala actress and screamed
"See, See there SEE
That Kerala No.1 Actress.
(Blows Kisses) She, My Heart!!"
and waves

Someone, tell this guy to keep his hands on the wheel and eyes on the road.

A woman was standing in the middle of the road, instead of the sides and Dil sounded his horn asking her to move aside and commented to himself
"Nice woman, why in road middle standing"
To which Shareef made a hilarious remark with 'middle standing'

First stop was the backwaters at Alleppey, where we toured in the famous houseboats. It was a bit boring, except for our conversation with the Nepali couple. We asked if they had been to Hyderabad and savored out biryani. They said they hadn't been to Hyd but had tasted biryani at Cochin and claimed it to be very spicy. Now, one thing about the hotels at Kerala is that most of their curries are sweet and they don't use many spices.
Tum log Hyderabad aake khao biryani, peeche aag lag jaana

Next was a special Thali meal with 7 curries. The annoying thing is that, by the time you taste all the curries you have no rice left; and moreover, you don't even remember which curry was good.

Next was the ship cruise to Mattancherry and the nearby Jew Town district with its synagogue, narrow streets, antique shops and spice auction houses, the Dutch Palace and then Fort Cochin. Quite a few foreigners come here, and every gori turned 9 heads.
We weren't the only 9 present there

We were back at our hotel by 6, did a bit of shopping, dinner which saw a debate between Faisal and Muneer, and then retired for the night.

March 6th:- Miraculously, we were all ready by 7:30 and started for Munnar in a Qualis. The driver was a chap Mahesh.
The treacherous Ghat roads with its twists and turns, and our driver who made the tyres screech in pain, really made one's stomach turn. Adding to that the car had woofers that drove you through the roof. I, unfortunately was at the back seat and the woofers right below me, enough to ease any problems of constipation if one were suffering from. And when the song Masti ki Paatshaala from RDB is played with the starting beats Loose Control; you really do loose control. We had to stop twice, cos of Shareef's vomitings. Thankfully, he was fine after that. The driver played Mar jaani from Billoo Barber a dozen times, driving us insane literally mar gaye. We reached Munnar by 11 and checked into Raahath Inn, pretty nice hotel. Being a Friday, we quickly got ready and headed to the only mosque in Munnar. It was in the process of expansion, wherein a floor was being added on top. Now, this makes the place cooler, and Munnar is already a very cool place. The sermon was initially delivered in Malyalam, and the cool atmosphere ensured that 7 of us 9 dozed off during the sermon. Satan must have been so proud
(Note:- This is nothing to brag about. May the Almighty forgive us)

After prayer, we stop for lunch at a place, where a few ordered biryani. It was delivered 30 mins late and wasn't as piping hot as it should be. Many didnt bother and ate. But, Hussain and Zakir sent it back saying they wanted it warmer. The waiter then disappeared leaving 2 hungry and cold boys hanging. Hussain called the waiter and said
"What is this, how much time you will take?
I am dying here"

Finally, after 20 mins and 7 of us having toothpicks between our lips came hot food. Believe me, the biryani outside Hyderabad is a disgrace.

Visited Echo point, another round of boating. Had coconut water and asked the price after our last sip. He said Rs. 20 per coconut i.e. total Rs. 180!!!
We argued, bargained, haggled, wrangled...
Hussain and Shareef at the forefront. Hussain said something to which the coconut wala picked up his sickle and replied in Malyalam, which translated is simply
" Pairon ke beech mein se kaatke tumhare do tukhde kar detu"

We drive by the unending expanse of tea plantations - pristine valleys and mountains, the shy buffaloes on the way, the cool air. Munnar, truly a beautiful place. Hussain, Imad and Zakir even proclaimed that they would spend their honeymoon at Munnar
Abhi tum log shaadi to karo, moon ke khawb baad mein dekho

That night, as we were going out for dinner, we came across street vendors selling jackets at Rs. 100 a piece!!!
Hussain, pounced at them mercilessly followed by the rest of us, and we literally left the vendors naked. Bargaining, haggling over the prices that we could have made it into a Guinness Record of sorts.
Next, after dinner we retire for the night.

March 7th:- Have breakfast, at a place which served one of the best Masala dosas I ever had. At 10, we start for Kodaikanal. We stop at a place Thekkedy for a night halt, as travelling after dark on the Ghat road is dangerous. We took two cottages belonging to Mr Ibrahimkutty, a wonderful and kind old man. (Not that he let us stay for free).
It was the name of the cottage that caught my eye.
King and Eve Roma
King and Eve Obama

Scenes of hilarity were to unfold at this quiet town, famous for it's wildlife sactuary; well, we had a bit of wildlife of ours to show.
We were famished after the long drive and so, went to some hotel which unfortuantely served only snacks at 5pm. Hussain ordered a cheese sandwich, and got a slice of cheese between two slices of bread. He asked the waiter
"What is this? You put only cheese in cheese sandwich? Where did you learn this recipe?"
This resulted in howls of laughter and an amused waiter, who bought him another one. Next, the 9 souls wandered around Thekkedy aimlessly, irritating shopkeepers. We stepped into some sort of woodcraft shop and picked a few items, bargained with the shopkeeper Mr Matthew, who fortunately was a cool and cheerful man. He criticised the Kerala govt. calling it bullshit, etc etc.
He enquired what we were planning after engineering. Imad said, we all have jobs, to which he replied, if you don't have jobs or any admits from colleges you can take some money from your father and go on a world tour.
Tumhare bawa ki jaagir hai kya. World tour kate. Ghar ke bahar ich kar dete hamesha ke liye.
Meanwhile, 2 others had gone for a massage. (They said it was done by men, God knows what really happened :) )
We returned to our cottages. Mr Ibrahimkutty's son Fazil bought in a dvd player for us. Now, Fazil had a habit of his eyes twitching, which scared Hussain, who exclaimed
"Arey miya une jab se mere ko 5 baar aankh maara. Duur rehna usse"
Hussain inserted the first dvd and played it. Since, we had all watched SlumDog, we fast tracked through it's scenes into the next movie. Now, the next came right out of the blue, and surprised us resulting in rounds of laughter. Imad saying
"Meri ainak kaha hai, meri ainak kaha hai"
Avinash commented
"Mast hai!.............Clarity"
Everyone exploded into laughter and he replied
"Arey mein TV ki clarity achhi hai bolru"
Shareef came and said
"Kaha zara SlumDog to lagao, dekhinge kya hai....."
Noorul said
"Kya re Hussain, kya kaaman karre tum"
And, then everyone started blaming Hussain for buying dvds from a train ( I think a few thanked him too....)
But, Hussain, lived up to his morals and broke the dvd.
Meanwhile, Zakir who was adamant on making a camp fire at night, was asleep by 7pm. Nothing could wake him up.
After jokes, jokes and more jokes we went to sleep.
March 8th:- 8:30, we start for Kodaikanal. After travelling a few hours, we had a puncture
Haan bhai, ye bhi hua. Jab We Met style. Puncture ke bina to trip incomplete rehti na

As the driver struggled for 2 hours to get things fixed, the rest of us sneaked into a guest house nearby which had caged rabbits, swans and a little monkey for our entertainment. Not to mention, we picked Imly from the trees nearby too. Shareef bhai had a certain stint in nature too......
Resuming our journey, we reached Kodaikanal by 2pm, checked into cottages at May Flower Guest House, washed up and were out for lunch. Made the mistake of going to a Silver Springs Restaurant, where they took 45 mins to get us food. Those who ordered chicken biryani, were in for a surprise, as they got red colored rice, and Zakir told the waiter
"Tomato rice nahi mangaaya na mein"
Apparently, rice here is red in color.
Without creating much fuss, we moved onto Kodai Lake for boating, which was fun except for the icy water that splashed onto my seat on the boat, cos the moment Hussain stands or sits the boat rocks voilently. Sitting on the wet seat for 20 mins, left me with a frozen bottom for the next two hours.
Next were quick stops at Pillar Rock, Suicide Point and other scenic places; followed by some mad shopping at a certain clothestore.

Reached our hotel, stayed in our jackets, wrapped ourselves in shawls and watched the Filmfare awards. Went out for dinner at a pretty nice place; the walk under the moon, the freezing breeze, hands in pockets, our speech being signaled by the visible vapor escaping our mouth.........a nice shivering walk as we trek slowly. Meanwhile, our driver was marching away wearing only a half shirt and a lungi.
Insaan hai ya saand hai ine

At dinner, our driver was in a very good mood, and called the shots ( we 9 would understand). He even gave Imad an address to visit in Karnataka, when he goes for his Infosys training.
After dinner, and a cool walk back to our lodge, we get to packing. For, me Hussain and Zakir this was a pretty tough task, but somehow we squeezed everything in.

March 9th:- The initial plan was to start by 7, see a few places and then leave for Coimbatore by 9. As, it is we woke up at 9 and had to leave for Coimbatore immediately. A smooth ride, except that it was a bit tight for everybody. Reached Coimbatore at 2, had lunch and boarded our train at 4:30 to return. Not many incidents on the train, except one when eunuchs came demanding money and the person sitting at the corner (he asked me to withold his name) was in a hilariously problematic situation. The term RRRaaajjja!!!! ( we 9 would know)

March 10th:- 2 pm. Back to Hyderabad

Few other things that need mention:-
There were a number of times when we crossed into Tamilnadu from Kerala and back by road. It isn't difficult to know when you are in Kerala and when you are in TN. Thanks, to the election season, on one side of the border you see posters of Achuthanandan and on the other side you see Mr. Karunandhini.
You would have figured out that I have a poor command over english. It just got worse during our trip. A few excerpts from my daily conversations with vendors, drivers...
"This how much price?
We 10 more friends in hotel. If you give at low price, all come here"
How, many hour journey this?"

Now, we are back home. Lots of work to be done.
Have to wonder how to do a 6 month final year project in 6 days.
Need to start record work,
Wonder if my single digit attendance %ges would be enough?
Have to think about exams

But, then the true engineering students that we are, we say
Choro miya, kaike exams. IPL start hora

The Cast

1) Faisal:- The coordinator of the tour, who took care of everyone and made sure everything was smooth. It's not easy controlling 8 wild gorillas. Faisal bhai, Hats Off!! You did a great job. I am ready for our next tour.
2) Shareef:- The manager of the tour, will be remembered as the Lal Badshah, and for his bargaining tactics with the vendors.
He shakes their hand and says
"Uncle, Thank you uncle, I will remember you uncle. I will go home and remember that you gave me discount. "
If the vendor was still stubborn, I wonder if Shareef would have resorted to huggs and kisses

3) Avinash:- Best remembered for forgetting his bag at field in Munnar, where we stopped for a photo shoot. Miraculously, he got it back.

4) Hussain:- The star comedian on the tour, who will be remembered for his mindless antics, the dvd, Rs.200; and for making us all memorize his dialogues
"Kaun, Mein?" "Hyderabad"
and his bargaining with the vendors.
"Arey what!! 300 rupees!!! Last week my brother came here and he bought for 200."

"There that shopowner is giving for so less"

5) Muneer:- He kept us in splits throughout the journey with his witty comments. He has a problem pronouncing 'land'. Also, his periodic "SRK rocks, A.R. Rahman rocks" antics; and of course "Shoot"

6) Noorul:- Added to Muneer's humor all the way. He and Muneer creat a riot of sorts. Will, also be remembered for pulling Hussain's leg all the way.

7) Zakir:- He can't stay awake beyond 11pm, no matter what and gets tired easily. Will be remembered for buying jumbo size jackets that would fit 5 Zakirs, and complaining while packing that his bags are full.

8) Imad:- The intellectual, mention something and he fires away on the topic driving you insane. Got to know that he has a passionate crush on Deepika, Kangana and the no. of times he mentioned a certain Z____ drove us all to zzzzz..... Waiting to hear his experience in Karnataka when he visits Mahesh's recommended address.

9)And last, but not the least, Yours truly, ME

Special Appearance

Dil, Mahesh, Sateesh the drivers
Ibrahimbutty, Fazil the cottage owners
Mathhew the art shop owner
The angry coconut wala,

Thanks to everyone mentioned above. Especially the 8.
Each and everyone of you made this tour a memorable one, something I will remember throughout my life.
Thanks to Shareef, and Avinash's moms for packing us food.

Special thanks to the Almighty, for guiding us throughout and bringing us back safe and sound. No amount of thanksgiving is enough.

Want to know who was the happiest during the trip.

Well,
The happiest people were
My folks at home, as they say
"Tum nahi the itne din, ghar pe achha sukoon tha"

I had decided that I would put up a post on my tour while sitting in the train on my way back. There was simply so much to write about. 9 days, or 216 hours. Every moment was something to cherish, something we will remember. Many things which I couldn't put up or forgot to. Perhaps, the other 8 could give inputs.

On our way back, I sit by the window, looking at the landscape pass me by. The scenes flying past the window, remind me of the 9 days that passed by so fast, the fleeing houses like fleeting memories.
The trees, the green farms, the infinite blue sky, the occasional bridges.
Each tree that passes by, reminds me of a moment of fun;
Each junction we stop at, reminds me of the breaks we took during out journey.
Each hawker that walks by our bogie, signifies the people who made a special appearance in our trip.
I go into rewind mode, thinking of the fun we had; a smile across my lips that lasts a few seconds.

But, then reality dawned. My last days at college, last few days with friends. 4 years of friendship and now the pain of knowing that we will soon be moving away from each other. Memories of not only the last 10 days, but the last 4 years flash by. A few months down the line, and we would be out of college, heading our own ways. Then, who knows when we may meet again. I look at my friends. There is a somber mood, perhaps they share my thoughts.

So, does this tour mark the end of our friendship days.
Believe me,
This tour only marked
the beginning of a renewed friendship........


                                              Friends Forever
 [ L-R= Imad, Me, Hussain, Shareef, Zakir, Muneer, Fasial, Noorul  Pic:- courtesy Avinash ]

(To those, who weren't on the tour with us, Let's plan another one)

10 comments:

hussaintaj said...

Yes......"Friends for ever".......

Unknown said...

u had a great tour masha allah... and the last few lines that u wrote.. they r really touching..

Ahmed said...

@hussain,
Yes Inshallah

@Faheem
Yes, Alhamdulillah we had a great tour. Looking forward for our next one :)

touseef said...

gr8 tour man... nd gr8er description by the gr8st man.... good job remembering every detail... nd this will be btween us .. just who were the 2 guys who went 4 a massage....

nd hussain bhai aapke jaise custoners mile to mai zindagi bhar thele leke phirtu


nd 1 earnest request... if u r planning another tour then plz let the ece-a guys also know coz i think there will be a few here who would be interested... like urs truly...

Ahmed said...

@ touseef
We, would love to have you guys along.
Let us know if you are planning a tour too.
(and the two guys were the ones with initials SF and AC;
it was a male massage)

hussaintaj said...

@tauseef,

Nai bhai uski naubat nai aati lo...

Qamaqan badnaam kardiya Ahmed....

Ahmed said...

8 log gawaah hai, ke mein jo likha, sahi likha

Unknown said...

the last lines were really touching yaar... we will remain "Friends for ever"... insha allah...


@touseef
the guys who went for massage are avinash and me...it was a male massage... kuch galat mat samjho bhai...

Ahmed said...

male nahi tha to touseef bhai bhi interested dikhre :D

Unknown said...

hmm, 1 of dabest tours i've ever had coz it was wid my frnds.
someone has said,"friendship is single soul living in 2 bodies."
but throughout da tour it was lyk single soul living in 9 bodies.
ahmed bhai should hav put da caption " SINGLE SOUL WANDERING WID 9 BODIES."
spl tnx 2 hussain bhai n munnu darling who hav made DA SOUL more lively n wonderful.
da whole 10 days were lyk dreams passing by in da night except for da one day(da day i was ill) which was lyk nightmare!!!
im looking forward for another tour with double enthusiasm.
luv u guys out dere!!